Chapter 13: Run away to where?

 

She turned her upper body towards him. "Wouldn't it be weird for the counselor to seek counsel from the client?" she asked, a slight smile on her lips. He shook his head, a charming smile graced his lips. Lissa was captivated by it. "Not at all," he said, "once the counselor accepts that the client is open to being a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on."

 

Lissa dreamt that Shane was laying beside her. He circled his arms around her and held her close to his body. She turned around and placed her hand on his chest and felt his heart beat.

"Baby, I love you. I will never leave your side again," he said. He touched her face and kissed her lips. Lissa woke up. She felt at peace. The dream felt so real. She turned on her side and went to sleep with a smile on her face.

***

Shane stood outside the Dixon residence. He was observing the house from the thick shadows of a neighbour's backyard. He also wore full black to blend in. He cautiously looked around him then focused his gaze on the house. It was dark inside except for a faint light he could barely make out in the room with the busted out window.

He couldn't believe the extensive damage to the house. Besides the busted out window, the front wall of the house was riddled with bullets, and there was no front door, only police crime scene tape. It wasn't conventional practice for the victims of such a crime to be allowed to remain in the house afterwards, so he hoped Dana could give him some answers.

He grimaced and shook his head. He had a draw down of funds coming within the next month from one of his investments. It was supposed to go towards a farm he had purchased a few months ago. He was now contemplating if he should give that money to the Dixons for house repairs or invest it first then when he received the first profits give that to them.

Lissa, my sweet, beautiful baby! He could feel his yearning for her increasingly pulling him to her. His longing for her was so strong it was almost something palpable. It felt like there was a magnetic force compelling him to be with her.

He leaned against a tree in the yard and closed his eyes as he thought of her. "Sweet baby, I'm sorry for staying away from you for so long. But I'm back now. I won't leave you again," he whispered. He imagined his arms around her, holding her close. He would use his body to comfort and protect her; keep her safe and reassure her. He missed her. He was gonna have to find a way to be with her and evade Mr Z. "God help me," he said quietly.

He thought of her soft, warm body; her tempting lips, her laugh and her smile. He really needed her. He needed her to touch him. He sighed. The ache he felt for her had grown everyday and then it subsided a little, but it never went away. Somehow however, he managed to function, but it felt like an odd emptiness had taken over his life. Though he found a way to cope, he missed her very much.

But now, being so close to her, it felt like the floodgates were open and he could hardly contain his excitement in seeing her. He wished he could sneak into her room but he couldn't risk one of Mr Z's spies seeing him. He learned from Red Man that Z had spies in every nook and cranny of the country. He couldn't say it was luck why he was still alive.

Yes, he was extra careful, but he believed it was God's divine covering that was keeping him safe. He was convinced it was. He prayed God helped him with his plan tomorrow. He was gonna see her and he needed to see her. It was torture being away from her.

He walked through the neighbour's yard and carefully climbed over the fence. He walked briskly down the road and crossed over to an adjoining street that ended in a cul de sac. He walked up to his motorcycle and checked it before before he mounted it. He switched on the engine and drove off.

***

Lissa woke up to her phone ringing. Sleepily, she reached for it and almost dropped it. Fortunately, her fingers were able to securely grip it before it slipped out of her hand. She fumbled a little in handling it but managed to answer.

"Hello," she croaked over the line.

She heard silence. She yawned softly.

"Hello?" she said, but still no response. She was feeling annoyed now.

"Who is this?" she said, now feeling perplexed.

She was about to hang up when she heard someone breathing on the line, then:

"Like a lily among the thorns is my darling among the young women. How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes are doves."

Lissa's heart started to race. "Shane?! Shane baby?"

"Yes, sweet baby, it's me." Shane answered.

"Oh Shane!" she whispered. "Baby, I've missed you so much!"

"I know baby. I am so very sorry about all of this. I won't leave you ever again. I need to see you ..."

"Well, yes of course, I ..."

"Baby, I need you to listen to me," Shane said interrupting her.

"I need to take you far away from this situation. Very far. I love you and I am sorry I put through this, but now I am here and I'm not letting you go. But I need you to trust me."

She listened to him, her heart pounding. She wondered what he wanted her to do. "Whatever it is I am willing to make the sacrifice for you," she said.

"Do you have a passport?" he asked.

Oh wow! That is not the question I expected, she thought.

"Yes I do," she replied.

"What I want you to do may make your parents angry with you, but I promise you I will make it up to them."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Come away with me," he said. "In order for me to make sure you're safe we need to leave the country," Shane said.

Lissa sighed. Definitely not what she wanted to hear, but she understood why he said it.

"Baby, I-I don't know. That is a big step," she replied. "Where are we going?" she asked

"I don't want to say over the phone, but when we meet, I will tell you everything, I've missed you," he told her. She didn't know what to say. "I don't know," she said. This was sudden.

"Run away with me Lissa," he said. His voice dipped to a seductive timbre. Lissa felt her body melt for the way his voice sounded, but her mind screamed, Run away? Run away to where?

"I love you. I want to give our kids a normal life. Come with me." He heard her silence and felt disappointed.

He cleared his throat. "I'll be flying out of the country tonight and I want you with me. If you decide to come with me, I'll be waiting for you at the ABM on Half Way Tree Road at 3:30 p.m. I love you. I don't want to be away from you, but if you're uncomfortable I can understand. But this is a step I have to take."

Shane's heart ached. He hated putting her in this awkward position, but he needed her by his side and also safe at the same time.

"What about your job?" she asked flabbergasted.

"I sent a letter to HR stating my resignation," he said.

"Shane?! Baby!" she exclaimed. This revelation shook her to the core.

"But ... but you can't just leave, there's a process. Baby are you joking?" she started to laugh nervously. "You ... You can't be serious?"

She heard silence.

"Shane?" More silence.

"Shane?!" She listened then looked at the phone screen. She pressed the power button so the screen could light up. He hung up.

She redialed the number but it rang without answer. She called again but the call went to voicemail. A tear rolled down her face. She dialed Supe Dacres' personal cell number.

"Hello, good morning," Supe answered.

"Supe, we need to find Shane, and right now!" she said, her voice trembling.

Superintendent Dacres sighed. "We're doing our best," he replied.

"Superintendent, please forgive my forwardness but you saying that is not good enough," she said frustrated. "Shane just called. He said he gave in his resignation letter!"

"What?!" Supe Dacres said. "I haven't heard anything. Listen, I'm heading in to work. I'll be there in the next fifteen minutes, be here by half hour the latest," he said.

"Will do," Lissa said, scooting over to the edge of the bed.

"Good," he said and hung up. Lissa went to bathe.

***

At 8:30 a.m. Derrick called her and she answered. "Hello," she said.

"Hey, Lissa. About what we discussed yesterday. I was able to get a slot in with a doctor friend of mine. He's a gynae. His name is Dr. Mitchell, he's willing to see us between 1:30 to 2:30 p.m. We can get there by about 1:50 p.m. Lissa sighed. This now? I haven't even decided if I'll be going anywhere with Shane.

"Derrick, I'm not sure about that. I may have to be somewhere later," she said feeling tired. She was in a taxi en route to the police station. She heard Derrick sigh, then say, "Lissa honey, look, I'm sorry about everything, I wish things were different but I need to know. I want to know if these babies are mine. If these babies belong to Shane I promise not to bother you. I love you, but I understand you will never be mine again. I-I just need to know."

Lissa sighed. "What time did you say again?" she asked.

"At 1:30 p.m," he told her.

"I'll be at work when you're on your way, call me first," she said.

"Will do," Derrick said, then ended the call.

***

Lissa stepped into the police station and greeted her colleagues, who smiled and told her, "Good morning". She put her arms around Sudanie from behind, who jumped being startled. Lissa laughed softly. Sudanie turned around and playfully slapped her friend's arm.

"Hey you! You know I'm ticklish!" She turned around, reached out and hugged her friend. She rubbed Lissa's back. "You okay?" she asked.

Lissa squeezed her. "Yeah, I'm good."

She released Sudanie from her embrace. "How's your family?" Sudanie asked.

"They're upset about the situation, understandably. We have no front door," she said sadly.

"Mark and Shevon still at your house?" Sudanie asked.

Lissa nodded. "Yeah, they are until about 2 o'clock then I think there will be a shift until about 8 o'clock if we haven't moved out before then, but after 8 o'clock we're on our own. My dad will be buying a door today," she told her.

Sudanie touched Lissa's tummy. "And how are the little ones today?" she asked smiling.

"I think they're fine," she said. She paused. It dawned on her that she hadn't been paying much attention to them as she should be. She felt guilty. She needed to see an OB. She cleared her throat. "I'll be seeing an OBGYN today."

"Oh nice!" Sudanie sobered. "So what are you doing here? You're supposed to be on holiday."

"Yeah, but something came up. I need to see Supe about something."

Sudanie looked at her with a curious look, her eyebrows raised. "Okay," she said.

"Will you have time for us to catch up?" Sudie asked her friend.

Lissa sighed. "I don't think so. I have to leave early for the gynae appointment, and I'm not sure how long my meeting with Supe will be."

Sudanie nodded. "Okay," she said, but she could sense that something was off about her friend.

Lissa gave Sudanie a brief hug then headed towards Superintendent Dacres' office. She knocked on the door. She heard Supe say, "Come." She turned the door knob and walked inside. He gestured for her to have a seat. Lissa walked to the chairs in the room and sat on the one on the right. She waited quietly for him to initiate the conversation.

He put away some files in his desk drawer, looked up at her and smiled sadly. "I contacted the Human Resource Branch, a friend of mine confirmed that he has put in his letter. I told them to put a hold on accepting it," he said.

Lissa felt her stomach do flips. She was panicking. "What can we do?" she asked.

"What else did he say to you?" Supe asked resting his elbows on the desk.

She cleared her throat. "He said he wants me to go abroad with him to escape Mr Z but he didn't say where. He wants me to meet him by the ABM on Half Way Tree Road," she said. Supe looked at her, eyebrows raised. He could understand why. They went ruthlessly after her. The lawyer's daughter and Lissa's brother would have been a tragic mistake if God wasn't on their side.

"What did you say to him?" he asked.

Lissa sighed. "I told him that was a big step for me. He wants me to run off with him and only tell my parents afterwards."

"Did he say that?"

"No, well no, but he sounded like that was what he was saying," she replied feeling flustered and confused.

Supe Dacres sighed. "He's afraid of losing you. To be honest if I were in his position and some perp threatened my wife and children I would have a big problem with that."

Lissa looked into the Supe's eyes. She saw anger. She lowered her head. She didn't know what to do.

What should I do?" she asked.

"I can't give the answer to that," he said. "What I do know is that I don't think leaving the country is the best move. What time are you supposed to meet him?"

"He said at 3:30. After I sort of rebuffed the idea of leaving he hung up. I haven't heard from him since," she replied.

"He loves you. He's gonna call again. This time you're gonna agree to meet with him. We'll be with you, we need to talk him out of what he plans on doing," Supe said. He smiled kindly at her.

Supe Dacres glanced at the time. It was 9:45 a.m. He said, "I need to make a phone call. So we'll talk again. Call me the minute he calls you back."

Lissa nodded. "I will," she said.

Just then Lissa's phone started to ring. She answered. She was surprised to hear from Shane's brother.

"Shaun, hi," she answered feeling perplexed.

"Hey Lissa," Shaun replied.

"You've heard from Shane?" she asked getting straight to the point.

"Yeah I have," Shaun said. "You planning on going with him?" he asked.

Lissa sighed harder. "So he told you?"

"Yeah he did. Mom and dad don't know though."

"So why are you calling me?" Lissa asked.

"I have the plane tickets. He asked me to purchase them for you guys," Shaun said.

"I see," Lissa said. She looked up and saw Supe Dacres watching her. "Is he near you?"

"No, he isn't. Actually, I don't know where he is. I'm supposed to take you guys to the airport so I'll see him then but that's all I know," Shaun said.

Lissa leaned back in the chair. She was getting a headache. "What time should I meet you?"

"At 1 o'clock," he said.

Lissa touched her temples. Yeah, the headache was coming on stronger. Meeting him at one (1) would mean missing the appointment to see the gynae with Derrick. "I-I don't know," she said.

Shaun was silent. He sighed then said, "This is a big step for you, but he's only doing this to keep you safe. You've only been together for a few months so I get you being doubtful. The fact is however, there is a man out there somewhere who won't stop until he hurts my brother, and as you've seen, is willing to hurt you or anyone in his way to get to him."

Where are you now?" he asked.

"At work," she answered.

She heard the sound of paper being moved around in his background. "I can't force you to leave, and my brother can't either, but if you're willing to meet him, I have the tickets. I can come for you at the station and drop you off wherever you want to go, whether it's home to pack or whatever. Let me know as soon as possible. Talk soon." He hung up. Lissa looked at the phone. She was beginning to be peeved about the situation.

"That was his brother, Shaun, he says he has plane tickets for me and Shane, and he's supposed to come get me," Lissa put her mobile phone in her bag. I need to think. This is too much!

Supe looked at her sadly. "I'm very sorry," he said. "What will you do?" he asked hoping she wouldn't decide to leave with him. Lissa shook her head. She didn't know. She wanted to be with him but she didn't want to leave her family. She bowed her head and put her face in the palm of her hand. She squeezed the tears back. She needed to clear her head. "I don't know," she said with a sigh.

She took out her phone and looked at the time. It was 10:30 a.m. This was difficult for her. She needed to think everything through. She looked at Supe Dacres. She felt tired. "I need a favor," she said.

"Anything," Supe Dacres replied.

"I need a lift to Hope Gardens. I know it's crazy to ask, but I need somewhere to clear my head," she said.

Supe Dacres nodded. "I'll get Corporal Stewart to drive you there. He'll be off duty at around 11. That okay?"

Lissa nodded. "Thank you," she said.

She walked out of Supe's office and headed to her own and waited for Stewart to come for her. Promptly at 11 o'click there was a knock on her door. "Come in," she said. Corporal Ryan Stewart opened her door. He smiled at her. As she got up to leave with him, he reached for her bag. She was reluctant to give it to him, but he gently insisted and she yielded it to him.

As he drove, he played some R&B/Soul music, and sang along quietly. She listened to him and realized he had a good singing voice. "You sing well," she said smiling at him. Corporal Stewart smiled back at her. "Thank you," he said simply. Lissa observed him closely.

He was a man in his early thirties like she was, soft spoken, affable, and friendly, with a quiet demeanor. He did not speak much but was always kind to her. He looked about 6'1" or 6'2", with brown skin and dark brown eyes that were disarming to look at. Like all the other male police officers his hair was cut low, no beard, but he wore a thin mustache that actually made him look quite handsome. As she sized him up, she wondered about Shane: Where he was. What he was doing. She missed him.

He stared at her with a quizzical look on his face. "Is something wrong?" he asked.

Lissa blinked and focused on him. Her mind had wandered off on her problems.

"I-I'm sorry Ryan forgive me," she responded. "My thoughts wandered." She smiled apologetically at him.

He smiled broadly at her. "That's fine. I realize you have a lot on your plate right now. I'm sorry to hear about what happened at your home," he said sincerely. "And congrats on the baby. I don't think we spoke since March at the Passing Out Parade."

Lissa smiled. "Thank you. I'm actually having twins," she told him.

With eyebrows raised, he quickly glanced at her tummy then focused his eyes on the road. "Wow! I'm happy for you. I guess Sarge must be very happy," he said with a faint smile.

As they turned up Old Hope Road she watched as he maneuvered the vehicle, a Honda Civic 2023 model, quite easily. She watched his hands thinking how neat they were, like the kind a doctor would have.

He increased the vehicle's speed after they passed the first traffic light. Within minutes he was turning into the Hope Botanical Gardens. He parked his vehicle. Adjusting his car seat, he pushed it into a reclined position so that he could lay back in the car. He closed his eyes. She looked at him.

"I thought you were supposed to just drop me off and then go home?" she asked surprised.

He chuckled. "Supe asked me to make sure you're okay. I do what Supe says. He is my commanding officer," he said simply.

"You must be tired. Are you? Aren't you tired?" she asked. She felt guilty. She was being a burden to the people who she cared for the most.

Corporal Stewart smiled, but did not open his eyes. She had to admit he had a charming smile.

"It's fine. I'll take a nap, however, if you don't mind. If you want to take a walk or anything like that in the Gardens, just let me know. I just need half an hour to recharge then I'll be fine. I'll take you home if you want then I'll head home," he said.

"I-I don't want to put you out of your way," she protested.

He opened his eyes and looked at her. She hadn't noticed how warm, chocolatey-brown his eyes were in the sunlight. They were unnerving in their color. A look passed across his face and then it was gone. He cleared his throat. "It's not a problem Ms Dixon. Considering what you've been through, and how you've helped me in the past, this is the least I can do," he answered. He closed his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest.

She had counseled him through the grief of losing his mother to cancer. He had bottled up everything inside, and it nearly cost him his life. While he was on duty a group of criminals ambushed him and his colleagues. He froze. A few minutes before, he was thinking of his mother's death and how he wished he could have been there for her but on the night she died he had to work. He felt guilty.

Fortunately, Lissa was able to help him see that it wasn't his fault, and that he did all he could to be with her, whenever he could. Her passing was very sudden. One minute, it seemed as though she was responding well to the treatment, then she flat lined. The doctor said she had a heart attack. She had cervical cancer that had spread to her other organs. They found out too late.

Lissa remembered he never cried. He was too stoic for that, but he did open up about what he was feeling and did the mental wellness activities she asked him to do. She was glad to see that all was well with him.

She looked at him, feeling guilty. "Will tomorrow be your day off?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yeah, it is."

Lissa felt a little better. "Okay," she said feeling relieved. At least he'll have time to rest tomorrow. She sat back in the car seat and looked out the window.

What should she do? Should she go for a walk or just stay in the car and think. She sighed. I need the fresh air and the sunlight. She gently tapped Corp. Stewart on the shoulder.

"I'm taking a walk," she told him. He opened his eyes and nodded tiredly at her. Oh God this isn't fair! Maybe I shouldn't have asked for the favor. This man could get to go home and sleep, she thought to herself.

"Make sure you're in my line of sight at all times," he responded. Lissa nodded.

"Please call me Lissa," she told him. She smiled at him.

He smiled politely. "Thanks for letting me know, but I'd prefer calling you Ms Dixon," he said.

Lissa nodded. She couldn't fight that. "Okay. Understood." He closed his eyes.

Lissa got out of the car and closed it as quietly as she could. She walked to one of the gazebos nearby and sat down. She looked around her at the trees and lush greenery of the grassy areas.

This was one of the childhood memories she cherished. When she was a child, her parents would bring her here to have picnics. Of course, visiting the zoo section, after eating lunch to see the animals, was always a treat to her. She sighed and took a deep breath.

She loved Shane very much, but she couldn't just leave like that. She knew the situation was dire, but she couldn't see herself running away. She didn't even know where they were going.

There had to be another way. She desperately wanted to see him, to feel his arms around her, but she couldn't just leave her parents. And if she ran off now without telling them, it would completely break the little trust they had left for her. Even if she was brave enough to tell them, she knew they would probably never forgive her.

She turned her back to the gazebo's round table and leaned on it. She looked in front of her and saw a couple sitting on a thick blanket in the grass, a few metres away. The woman was attempting to feed the man fruit. She was smiling, while the man pretended he didn't want to be fed.

Eventually, he opened his mouth to receive the piece of pineapple. He then grabbed his woman and kissed her on the cheek. They both started laughing. Lissa watched them smiling. She was happy for the lovers. She wished her situation was similar to theirs.

She watched as the woman laid out a small platter filled with sandwiches; a small cake box with what looked liked carrot cake, two bottles of sparkling wine, and a clear, plastic pastry box containing donuts. Lissa felt her mouth watering as she watched them eating.

She hadn't noticed that 30 minutes had passed until she glanced at her phone. She wondered if Corporal Ryan was sleeping. She returned her gaze to the couple and smiled as she watched them. She missed Shane so much. She sighed heavily.

Out of the corner of her eye she noticed movement. She looked around to see Corporal Stewart walking towards her. She watched him come closer. He climbed the steps and sat beside her.

"Supe called," he said. "You're supposed to be somewhere at a particular time?" He looked at her. His brown eyes seemed intrigued. She looked at the ground before her. She laughed but it wasn't one filled with humor.

He moved closer to her. "Is everything okay?" he asked. She looked to where the couple was now cuddling together. She squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head.

"It's just that I have poor choice in men," she said. She regretted the words that came from her mouth instantly. She opened her eyes and looked at Corporal Stewart. She meant no disrespect. "Oh, I'm sorry. I know that Sarge is like a mentor to you."

She eyed him nervously then looked away. He looked more heavier set than the last time she saw him in March. She wondered if he was about the 'gym life' too. She had to admit he looked good.

"Were you sleeping when Supe called?" she asked. She eyed him furtively.

He nodded. "I dozed a little." A tiny smile curved the corner of his mouth. "Sarge Crosby is sort of a mentor to me, yes, but Sarge Reynolds is more of a mentor to me than Crosby. It doesn't matter either way. You were very gracious to me when I was going through my rough patch. If I can, I would like to return the favor, if you want to talk."

She turned her upper body towards him. "Wouldn't it be weird for the counselor to seek counsel from the client?" she asked, a slight smile on her lips. He shook his head, a charming smile graced his lips. Lissa was captivated by it. "Not at all," he said, "once the counselor accepts that the client is open to being a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on."

She felt so tired, both physically and emotionally. She wanted to be strong for Shane, but she was at her breaking point. A tear slid down her face. She looked down at her sandals. "I'm pregnant for Shane but the thing is, I was in a relationship with someone before him. Last night my ex --the other man-- claimed that the twins could be his. We had er ... an encounter without protection while I was with him, and he thinks he could be the father, but I believe they are Shane's."

"Does Shane know?" Stewart asked. With eyebrows raised he watched her pained expression. He wished he could help her.

Lissa shook her head. "No, I haven't gotten the chance to tell him. Prior to this morning when he called, I haven't had the chance to talk to him since we came back from Westmoreland. Although, Rick, that's my ex, Rick told me his concerns just last night."

She sighed. "I told him I was pregnant with twins last night. That's when he told me twins run in his family and they could be his." She wrapped her arms around her torso and used her hands to rub her arms. She suddenly felt cold. "I haven't seen Shane for almost three months now. After what happened yesterday I thought he would come see me right away," Lissa said her voice cracking. No, I won't cry in front of this man, she told herself. "I can't do this," she whispered, taking a ragged breath.

Ryan came closer. "Permit me," he said. She looked at him confused. He smiled kindly at her then put his arm around her shoulders. She was shaking. "Do you feel cold?" he asked. His eyes showed his concern for her. She nodded. Lissa looked into them, shocked at how expressive they were. She hadn't noticed that before. She blinked and looked down at her hands.

Ryan rubbed her arm with his hand and pulled her closer to him. Her skin felt clammy. He wished he had his jeans blazer with him. He would put it around her. He gently squeezed her arm as he rubbed it. If she wanted to, he could put both arms around her so she could share some of his body heat. His sister always said he felt like he had a nuclear reactor core inside his body. He was always warm to touch.

"You're trembling," he told her.

Lissa sat stiffly in his embrace. She wanted to lean on him but felt awkward. "It's okay," he told her. He pulled her shoulders towards him. Lissa bent her head, tentatively resting it on his shoulder. But she couldn't relax.

Ryan could feel her body shaking. He continued to move his hand up and down her arm to help her feel better. "Miss Dixon," he began, "at the end of the day, you will have to make a decision in the best interest of your children. When it comes to kids, they are the first priority. You have to bear that in mind."

His voice was very soothing as he spoke calmly to her. She sighed and closed her eyes. She relaxed a little bit. She was grateful for how everyone was being kind to her since they found out about her pregnancy.

"Do you want me to take you home?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yes ... yes please," she said. She felt like crying. She shuddered. Ryan felt it and looked at her. Was she in pain?

She touched her tummy. He saw what she did. He was more concerned now. He observed her body language.

Babies, I am so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not a good mommy. Forgive me, she mused. She felt tired. She tried to stand but felt weak. She sat down again. Ryan, noticing the slight wobble in her movement, lightly placed his hand on her back.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

She nodded. "I-I feel dizzy," she answered.

"Do you want to go to the hospital?" he asked. He tightened his grip around her.

Lissa felt like her head was spinning. "I ... I don't feel good. I think I need to go home."

"Did you eat anything for breakfast?"

She shook her head. She knew she was supposed to, but she felt nauseous. She was going to wait until lunch time to try something bland like maybe steamed fish or soup, but she just got caught up with this situation.

"I've been feeling nauseous lately," she told him. "You know morning sickness. I was gonna eat something a little later."

He nodded. "Hmm, okay," he responded. His voice seemed to have softened to her ears.

"Would you eat something now?" he asked.

Lissa grimaced."I guess so," she replied.

"Can you stand?" he asked.

"I'll try," she said.

Ryan stood up first, then put his arms around her waist to pull her to her feet. He was very strong. She put her hands out to steady herself. They briefly brushed on his chest. She could feel solid muscle under his shirt.

During one of her counseling sessions with him, she encouraged him to find a hobby that was both fulfilling, and something he could sustain with his lifestyle. She was glad his new found hobby was paying off.

Lissa smiled up at him. He had his arm loosely around her waist as she stood. Grabbing onto his forearm, she felt like she would fall, but he said, "I got you. It's okay. Take a step forward."

Carefully, she reached down and took up her bag from the bench. She put one foot forward, then the other to descend the gazebo steps. He wrapped his arm more tightly around her as she moved. She could smell his cologne. It was subtle, but quite pleasant to the senses.

He walked her back to the car and made her sit down. He adjusted the car seat back a little so she could lean into it. He sat in his seat and lifted it up, adjusting it upright in front of the steering wheel.

Starting the car's engine, he adjusted his rear view mirror and looked at her. He backed away from where he had parked, then drove carefully through the entrance of the Gardens. He stopped at a gas station in Liguanea to fill his tank.

While they waited to be served, he took her in. She was very beautiful. She had gained weight but all it did was accentuate the curves she already had. Her baby bump was barely showing at this point. Her skin was soft to touch and she smelt really good. She had her hair in braids. She wore no makeup, but Ryan could clearly see she didn't need it.

"What do you feel like eating?" he asked. "I'll buy you lunch," he said.

"Oh no I couldn't, that would be selfish of me to impose. No, I don't think ..."

"I'm too tired to cook right now. I'm going to stop at one of these restaurant drive-thrus and order something anyway. I would feel bad to know I bought something for myself, and didn't make sure you are good," he said interrupting her.

He smiled at her. Lissa felt an odd fluttering in her chest. She nodded at him, a little confused about why she now felt attracted to him. "Okay," she said. "If you can get some chicken soup and maybe a chicken or fish sandwich, I'll be good."

Ryan nodded. "Okay," he replied, "I'll see what I can do."

After the attendant filled his tank and he paid, he drove to a restaurant close by and ordered the soup and sandwich for her, while he ordered cooked food for himself. When he drove to the pick up window, the rep smiled at them and gave Ryan their order. He handed Lissa her food and placed his food on his lap.

Lissa offered to hold his boxed lunch for him while he drove. He agreed. She rested his food on her lap and took a bite of her sandwich. It was tasty. She leaned forward and placed her bag at her feet, securing his food on her lap. She took a larger bite and chewed happily. Ryan glanced at her with an amused look on his face.

"Tastes good?" he asked.

She nodded while she chewed. She swallowed. "Yes, thank you," she answered. She licked mayonnaise off the corner of her mouth and giggled.

Ryan chuckled softly. "You're welcome," he said. He could see why Sarge was smitten. She's adorable. He focused on the road and increased his vehicle's speed. He needed to take her home and get some sleep.

He turned onto Lady Musgrave Road.

"You know where I live?" she asked

He recited her address to her. She was surprised. "But you've never been to my house?" She was really surprised.

He chuckled. "I overheard Sarge mention your address once or twice," he replied.

She didn't know this. "Who was he talking to?" she asked puzzled.

"Sarge Reynolds and Crawford. It was kind of a just in case I need you to look out for her kind of thing," he replied looking at her. He smiled.

"Oh," she said dumbfounded. Just in case something were to happen to him. She felt overwhelmed with emotion. She wiped tears from her eyes. Ryan saw that she was crying but decided to not say anything.

Lissa blinked back the tears and took deep breaths. He looked over at her and shook his head. He didn't know what Sarge was doing, but he wouldn't leave such a beautiful woman vulnerable like this. He focused his eyes on the road. It wasn't his business and she wasn't his woman.

As he drove, she watched him deftly steer the vehicle. After twenty minutes she was at her front gate. She looked at her house and realized that a new front door was installed. She was relieved. She turned to look at Corporal Stewart. "Thank you again," she said. She smiled at him shyly.

Corporal Stewart nodded. He was looking at the walls of the house. "If you want, I can help with the cement work on the house to repair those bullet holes," he told her.

"You know about construction?" she was pleasantly surprised.

He nodded. "That's my dad's business. I know a few things. I can come by on a weekend, on my days off, and see what I can do." He was assessing the walls with his eyes. Some bullets were still lodged in them.

"Did the forensic team say when they would return to gather evidence?" he asked.

"This Saturday I believe," she answered.

He nodded. "Okay, I'll let you know when I'll be free to come by. Give me your number?" Lissa told him and he saved it in his phone.

"Oh, by the way," he said, "the man they arrested at your house, refuses to talk, but Inspectors Lindsay and Simpson say they'll crack him soon."

"What about De'aundre or whatever his name is?" Lissa asked. She was tired of this whole thing.

"He's not talking either, but I think the detectives will get something out of him," he answered, trying to sound confident. He smiled reassuringly at her. "Everything will be okay." He squeezed her arm. She nodded. She placed his boxed food on the car seat. Retrieving her bag from the floor of the car, she opened the door and stepped out of his vehicle. Looking in at him, she smiled briefly.

"Thank you for today," she said.

"No problem. I'm glad to help," he said.

"I'm sorry for, you know, delaying your sleep time. And being a babbling mess." She smiled at him mischievously. She was tired of crying. She may as well laugh at her situation.

Ryan chuckled. Lissa's smile broadened. She liked his laugh.

"It's all good," he said. His eyes were beautiful to her. Lissa stared at them. "And you weren't a babbling mess." He sobered as he looked at her intently. She felt blood rushing to her cheeks. She cleared her throat and said, "Okay."

"Get some rest," he said amused. She is a gorgeous woman. He couldn't believe he never noticed that before.

He was about to drive off but paused. He felt like he needed to help her. "If you need help again you can call me." Quickly, he took out a pen from his shirt pocket. Opening his glove compartment, he took out a notepad and tore off a small piece of paper. He wrote his name and phone number on it and handed it to her. She took it smiling. "Thank you," she said.

"You're welcome," he replied.

He put the car in 'Drive' and drove off slowly. She watched him leave.

She crossed the road and walked towards Reynolds and Crawford in their patrol unit. "Good afternoon," she said. Reynolds smiled up at her. Crawford yawned.

"Afternoon, Lissa," Reynolds answered.

"Morning," Crawford said. Reynolds looked at his colleague and chuckled. Crawford, realizing his mistake, smiled sheepishly. Lissa smiled at them. She was grateful for their sacrifice.

"Thank you guys for staying over, Really appreciate you guys," she told them. She tapped the top of the patrol car. Sargeant Reynolds smiled. "Our pleasure," he said. Sarge Crawford nodded.

"Who will relieve you?" she asked.

"Campbell and Barracks," Crawford said.

"Okay, thank you," she said walking back to the house.

She walked up to the new front door and knocked. Her father opened the door for her. He smiled at her and asked if she was okay She smiled slightly and told him she was sorry for everything. Marcus hugged her and told her he loved her no matter what. He told her she looked tired and encouraged her to get some sleep. He would give her the key to the new front door later. Lissa nodded and climbed the stairs. She was tired.

She changed her clothes and lay on her bed. She thought of Ryan. So much had changed in ten months. He looked different. He seemed more confident, self assured and stronger both physically and mentally. When she saw him three months ago, she did notice he looked leaner, but wasn't really paying attention. She was happy for him. If she contributed to that in her own small way she was glad.

***

Ryan opened his front door and stepped inside. He placed his food on the coffee table. His eyes adjusted to the darkness in the room. He closed the door behind him then reached over to the wall on his left and flipped on the light switch. The fluorescent bulb lit up the room. He sighed tiredly.

He had been on his feet since 10 p.m. last night. And before then he did a double shift to help out a colleague who had an exam. He was exhausted. He rested his car keys on a nail in his bedroom, along with another larger bunch of keys useful to him.

He looked at himself in the mirror and began undressing. He thought of Miss Dixon, Melissa aka 'Lissa'. She said he should call her 'Lissa'. Obviously, a nickname derived from her first name Melissa. He wasn't comfortable calling her that, not yet anyway. They were work colleagues and she had helped him tremendously when he went through a time of depression after his mother's death.

She willingly met with him outside of her regular work hours to counsel him. Her kind and warm personality made it easier for him to open up to her, and she was very sensitive to his feelings. In a sense, he felt like he owed her some kind of debt. Though he figured she wouldn't see things that way. He stripped down to his underwear. He took his sweaty clothes to the clothes hamper in the bathroom and tucked them inside. He stripped naked and stepped in the shower to bathe.

After taking a shower, he went into the living room with a towel wrapped around his narrow hips, and opened the windows to let air and light in. He turned off the bulb and sat down on his dark brown couch.

He was curious about something. He got up and went into his work bag, which was hanging on a nail in his bedroom, and retrieved his phone. He walked back to his couch and lay down. The towel was still wrapped snugly around his hips.

He switched on his phone data and went into WhatsApp. He saved Miss Dixon's number in the app and waited for his phone to update WhatsApp statuses. He saw nothing from her. He decided to text her.

"Are you feeling okay?" he texted.

No response.

He reached for the TV's remote and turned it on. He was gonna watch an action movie to help him unwind. He pulled the bag covering his food and laid it aside. They put a plastic fork wrapped in paper towel on the top of the box. He unwrapped the fork, opened the box and started eating.

After five minutes had passed he heard a 'ping' sound from the phone. He reached for it on the coffee table and was pleased to see it was her replying to his text.

"Hi. Yes, I feel better. I ate everything. The soup was really nice. It hit the spot and I loved the sandwich. You're very kind," she replied.

Ryan smiled. "It was my pleasure. You were very kind to me when I needed it most," he texted then pressed send. He dug into his meal biting off a piece of chicken breast.

"Have you gotten any sleep yet?" she asked via text message. She was flattered by his concern. He had a gentle spirit she found soothing.

He shook his head, "No, not yet. I will though. Having my breakfast/lunch. I just wanted to make sure you are okay." He pressed send.

She was touched. "Thank you," she said. She was curious. "Remind me, what did you order for your lunch? It smelt really delish!" She pressed send.

He chuckled as he looked at the message. "Fried chicken with stewed pork gravy and fried rice, and a side of stir fried veggies." He sent the text smiling.

She sent three green hearts. "Sounds wonderful," with a jealous face.

Ryan laughed. He was enjoying himself. "Hush, maybe another time I'll treat you to it." Send.

"Thank you. I would like that," with a heart eyes emoji was her reply.

***

They chatted for an hour, passed the time she was supposed to meet Shaun for the airline tickets. She found Ryan easy to talk to and very calming on her nerves. She explained a little about Derrick and how she ended up being with Shane.

She briefly explained about Mr. Z, and how scared she was when she heard that her brother and his friend were trapped in the house during the gun attack. She got so comfortable, she joked about having 'love handles' and swollen feet. She was feeling bloated half the time, and the other half, tired and nauseous.

He reassured her that no one else noticed and that she looked great. He would refrain from saying she was beautiful. It would be inappropriate.

She told him he needed to get some sleep. He agreed. "Okay, let me know if there's anything else I can do for you." He pressed send.

She smiled at the message. Nah I don't think I need his help for anything else. But still ... "Thank you. I appreciate you." She added a heart emoji with her text, and a GIF of a girl doing a silly dance, then sent it off. She lay back in bed smiling.

Ryan saw her message and smiled. Quite adorable, he thought. He sent her a text with a rose, and, "I'm here if you need me," then turned off his data. He wondered what she would think of it. But decided he would let things be as they were. He took up the box with the leftovers and threw it in the trash can in the kitchen. He would take out the trash later that evening.

Lissa read the text and felt flushed. She smiled and hugged her pillow to her chest. He was a really nice guy.

She didn't know what to do about Shane or Mr Z or any of it, but she wasn't leaving Jamaica. Unbeknownst to Corporal Stewart, he had given her the answer she needed. Her work here was important to her. She couldn't leave her clients now. All the work she put into Ryan had paid off and now he was repaying the favor. He didn't need to, but she was still grateful.

She turned off her phone. She loved Shane but running off with him was too much to ask of her. She closed her eyes and thought of Ryan's strength as he helped her down the steps.

His voice was soft and reassuring as he spoke to her. She wouldn't say his voice was as deep or sexy as Shane's was, but it had a quality she liked hearing. She wasn't sure what it was, but it had a timbre that was endearing.

She wondered if he had someone. She wasn't eligible, but maybe she could play matchmaker. She felt a weird fluttering in her tummy while she chatted with him. He was very charming but not in a sleazy way. He was calm but very personable. She needed the break he provided from the mental battles she was waging in her head.

***

Ryan went into his bedroom to get dressed. He removed his towel and laid it on the edge of his bed. He was amused at himself for being aroused while talking to her. He looked at himself in the mirror.

Yes, she made him feel a little giddy while texting her. He thoroughly enjoyed conversing with her, but was surprised at his physical reaction. He shook his head and laughed. He got dressed quickly and lay down.

Closing his eyes, he wondered if she was really okay or was she pretending. He remembered how her body was shaking when he held her. He hoped everything would be okay for her. He breathed a short prayer for her, that God would sustain her strength. He turned on his side and drifted off to sleep.

***

Shane dialed Lissa's number repeatedly, but each time it went straight to voicemail. Shaun watched as little by little, it dawned on his brother that she wasn't leaving with him.

He put his hand on his twin's shoulder and squeezed. "Bro, she isn't coming," Shaun said. He was sad also. "I'm sorry."

Shane felt gutted. Had Derrick gotten to her? He still needed to leave, he had some family business to clear up overseas. Shaun couldn't go but he could. He was hoping to extend his stay with her in mind, but now that it seemed she wasn't going, he wondered if he should cut his time short and come back. He couldn't let her go.

He looked at his brother. "We still have that property overseas to check on. Take me to the airport. Just tell mom and dad I'm going to check on the condo in Miami. Inform them that I heard that people are attempting to 'squat' on it. I think it's time we find a buyer, don't you?"

Shaun nodded. "But mom and dad might consider it their retirement home," he reminded his brother.

"True, but they can always buy another one," Shane answered.

"What about renting?" Shaun asked. "The rental rates have fallen but we can still get a good price for it."

"But who will make sure everything goes smoothly with collecting rent and maintenance of property. Mr Wilson says he'll be retiring from being our caretaker by the end of the year. By the way, we'll need to do something special for him. If Lissa won't move with me I don't want to live overseas."

Shane shook his head. If Lissa wasn't coming with him, it didn't make sense for him to relocate. No doubt she was angry with him for leaving her all those months, and now demanding she up and leave with him was not helping the situation.

He should have thought this through from her perspective. He would still go through with the resignation process if his superiors accepted his letter. He wanted a normal life for himself and Lissa. Maybe after seeing her, being around her for a while, and explaining everything to her, she would be more willing to make the move for him.

"Selling is the only option. I'm gonna go look at the state of it. I'll call from there to give you guys an update," he told his brother. "And don't worry, as soon as I land, I'll call dad to explain the situation fully."

Shaun nodded his approval. "Ready?" he asked.

"Yeh man," Shane replied.

Shaun drove his brother to the Norman Manley International Airport and watched as he went through the boarding process. He waved him goodbye then drove home.

***

Supe Dacres called, waking Lissa from her sleep. She sat up and reached for the phone on the night table. She answered feeling miserable. "Hello," she said.

"I got a tip from customs at the NMIA airport. Someone fitting Shane's description just boarded a plane to Miami. They asked if I wanted him detained but I told them no. He hasn't done anything wrong. The man can travel. He is on leave." There was a pause, then, "Lissa, I'm very sorry," Supe said. She could hear the sympathy in his tone.

Lissa closed her eyes and lay back. "Thank you Supe. I-I'm gonna take a week off from seeing my clients on Mondays."

"That's fine, Stay home and rest, I am really sorry. He divulged to customs he will be away for ten days. So he will be coming back. I guess for you."

Lissa felt warm tears flow down her face. She was tired. She couldn't take this anymore.

"Okay," she croaked. "Supe, I'll talk to you later."

"Okay my dear. If you need anything let me know," he told her.

"Thank you sir," she replied.

"Okay," he said then ended the call.

Lissa wondered how the phone was on. She could have sworn she had turned it off. She looked at the screen and saw three (3) missed calls from Derrick and five (5) from Shane. She hissed her teeth. Both men were playing with her feelings, dealing with her as they felt it was convenient to them. She was done with this foolishness.

She sent Derrick a text: "I was helping my superior identify Shane's whereabouts. I am very sorry. The time slipped me. But I will be going to the gynae next week Thursday at a pre-scheduled appointment. Please don't ask to accompany me. I will take a picture of the printouts the doctors give me and send to you. I just need to be alone right now."

Immediately he called. She declined his call and turned off her phone. She didn't want to talk to anyone. Well, maybe Ryan, but he was probably asleep by now. She had an idea. Being at the botanical gardens was still a refreshing experience. Maybe she just needed some country air to set her right and help her forget for a little while.

She dialed her aunt's number. Aunty Sharon was pregnant also. They could sit together and exchange hilarious stories of being bloated, constipated or just nauseous. It wouldn't hurt to spend a week with her. Lissa chuckled. She heard the phone ring four times then her aunt's familiar voice came on the line.

"Hey aunty," she greeted her aunt. "How are you?"

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